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Steph and I are FINALLY closing on our condo tomorrow at 2:30!! Our new home will be at the Horizons condo's on Post Avenue in Westbury.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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To all of you who have been asking me since January where I am registered/telling me to register, Steph and I finally started making our registries. We are registered at Fortunoffs, Bed Bath & Beyond, and Target.
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Sunday, January 21st, 2007
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Saturday, December 30th, 2006
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Good things will happen in 2007. Just a gut feeling, this is going to be a very happy year.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Thursday, January 19th, 2006
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3 days after coming home from Vegas............. I book another trip out there for my buddy's bachelor party! March 9 - 12 at the Mirage.... god I love Vegas.
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Tuesday, January 17th, 2006
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Tuesday, January 3rd, 2006
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I bet you didn't know that.......
1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
2. When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you.
3. Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter he grew a beard.
4. Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
5. Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
6. Chuck Norris's girlfriend once asked him how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. He then shouted, "HOW DARE YOU RHYME IN THE PRESENCE OF CHUCK NORRIS!" and ripped out her throat. Holding his girlfriend's bloody throat in his hand he bellowed, "Don't fuck with Chuck!" Two years and five months later he realized the irony of this statement and laughed so hard that anyone within a hundred mile radius of the blast went deaf.
7. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
8. To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.
9. The original theme song to the Transformers was actually "Chuck Norris--more than meets the eye, Chuck Norris--robot in disguise," and starred Chuck Norris as a Texas Ranger who defended the earth from drug-dealing Decepticons and could turn into a pick-up. This was far too much awesome for a single show, however, so it was divided.
10. Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of "beard". Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus' obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.
11. Chuck Norris lives by only one rule: No fat Chicks.
12. When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, "Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."
13. Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
14. A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded.
15. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
16. Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying "booya".
17. Chuck Norris once went to a frat party, and proceeded to roundhouse every popped collar in sight. He then drank three kegs and shit on their floor, just because he's Chuck Norris.
18. Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with five times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer. This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.
19. Chuck Norris took my virginity, and he will sure as hell take yours. If you're thinking to yourself, "That's impossible, I already lost my virginity.", then you are dead wrong.
20. Chuck Norris found out about Conan O'Brien's lever that shows clips from "Walker: Texas Ranger" and is working on a way to make it show clips of Norris having sex with Conan's wife.
21. The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
22. Chuck Norris doesn't have normal white blood cells like you and I. His have a small black ring around them. This signifies that they are black belts in every form of martial arts and they roundhouse kick the shit out of viruses. That's why Chuck Norris never gets ill.
23. Chuck Norris frequently signs up for beginner karate classes, just so he can "accidentally" beat the shit out of little kids.
24. Chuck Norris once tried to sue Burger King after they refused to put razor wire in his Whopper Jr., insisting that that actually is "his" way.
25. One of the greatest cover-ups of the last century was the fact that Hitler did not commit suicide in his bunker, but was in fact tea-bagged to death by Chuck Norris.
26. Chuck Norris punched a woman in the vagina when she didn't give him exact change.
27. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
28. After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. His reasoning? It was more "humane".
29. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
30. Chuck Norris ruins the endings of Harry Potter books for children who just bought one for the hell of it. When they start crying Chuck Norris calmly says, "I'll give you something to cry about," and roundhouse kicks them in the face
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Tuesday, August 23rd, 2005
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Thursday, August 18th, 2005
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On August 30th, 2005, I will be going to the Opie & Anthony show to hang out while they are on the air......
ROCK ON!
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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I finally got a raise!!
Steph and I are looking to plan another cruise trip, this one for late November/December. Most likely an Eastern Caribbean Carnival cruise. If you are interested, let me know.
I hardly ever post.... and when I do, they are really short.
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Sunday, January 30th, 2005
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Where did we come from?
Why are we here?
Where do we go when we die?
What lies beyond,
And what lay before?
Is anything certain in life?
They say life is too short,
The here and the now,
And you're only given one shot
But could there be more,
Have I lived before,
Or could this be all that we've got?
R.I.P. Nancy & Mr. Mroz
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Monday, January 17th, 2005
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So I got back from my vacation yesterday, and man it was incredible. Here is the Coreys-notes version of the trip.
Flew down to New Orleans last Saturday morning with Steph, spent the day and night there. Bourbon Street is really really cool. I can only imagine what its like there during Mardi Gras. On Sunday we took a cab to the pier and got on our cruise ship rather quickly. We got there at around 11:30, and were on the ship by 12:10, which is amazingly fast. Spent the next week on the ship which went to Montego Bay - Jamaica, Grand Cayman, and Cozumel - Mexico. Went snorkeling, ate tons of food, spent some time on a beach, got some sun, had lots of drinks, and best of all, finally spent a lot of quality time w/ Steph. When we got back to New Orleans on Sunday, amazingly, we were the first people off the boat as well! (if you haven't been on a cruise before, the way you get off the ship is that they call colors of the color tags, and there were 14 colors on this ship). Our flight back to NY wasn't until 5:30 pm, and it was only 9:40 am, but we decided to go to the airport and try to get on an earlier flight. Luckily, we got on an 11:30 am flight (stand-by) and were home rather early! It was an amazing trip, and sorry none of you could make it, but I'm glad it worked out the way it did :)
Next time, more people will go!
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Friday, December 10th, 2004
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Thursday, October 21st, 2004
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Monday, August 23rd, 2004
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Happy Birthday to me...
and lucky me, I get to work on my birthday!!! JOY!!!!!
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, August 18th, 2004
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BUZZ!!!
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Alan : we're idiots
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rodneyhamp : you should see how hard im laughing right now
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Tuesday, August 3rd, 2004
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Wednesday, July 7th, 2004
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khammett's journal
happy.
tired.
somber.
cheerful.
blah.